There's a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can't get away.
I am a strong believer that being either a Dominant or a submissive does not preclude the person from being a person. I have never treated a sub as simply an object. That is not to say that I oppose humiliation techniques--that is many times part of the submissive lifestyle. But I do not believe in dehumanization techniques. I prefer a thinking, intelligent submissive who makes controlling her a bit of a challenge. And I have found such a jewel. On January 15, 2015, the sub known here as heavensmeadows officially accepted my collar.
I started in the lifestyle long before it was a lifestyle. There weren't any mentors, no training resources, just imagination and a joy of that special, intimate relationship. Even subs had to be recruited, then trained, from a vanilla crowd. Over the years, I have tried about every aspect of the lifestyle that does not permanently scar or harm the submissive.
While I enjoy role play, I prefer to help the submissive push her limits in both traditional sexual and nonsexual situations. But, for this to happen, we must trust each other. And I recognize that trust takes time to develop.
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