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Princess Diaries

I'm just an ordinary Princess living my fairytale in this extraordinary world of ours.

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How Many People Have You Met from Alt?
Posted:May 18, 2018 5:39 am
Last Updated:May 28, 2018 12:51 pm

I know this gets asked from time to time and I’ve also asked something similar but not for a long time (so my situation has changed). Also I had not done a poll for a long time so...

Some further questions to answer if you fancy clarifying:

1. How many people have you met face-to-face from alt (this is the poll question)?
2. Did you meet as friends and how many became more than friends?
3. How many of them are bloggers?
4. Any no-shows?
5. How long have you been on alt?

My answers are in comments.

Princess Tinks
0 - zero
More than 20
82 Comments , 124 votes
He is the Best Thing that Ever Happened to Me...
Posted:May 11, 2018 1:37 am
Last Updated:May 20, 2018 2:31 pm
He is the best thing that ever happened to me... and the worst. I had done perfectly well in the previous three and a half decades without truly loving a man. I had never really given my all and totally opened myself to anyone before. Neither had he. We were such a perfect fit and not only sexually (although it’s the sexual side of things that got off-balance in the last year). However my life was a lot easier before meeting him in a sense that when you don’t reach such heights the drop isn’t quite so painful either. For sure I’ve had fun most of my life but it was previously all so much more lighthearted. Boyfriend troubles never truly hurt. I never got stuck but swiftly moved on.

I’m sitting on top of a moor overlooking the most gorgeous dale. I’ve been too busy to do anything like this for weeks. I had numerous of my morning chats with him sitting on this exact spot. I miss him, my best friend. When we broke up last year the situation was almost easier, albeit more dramatic and hurtful, as there was a sense of betrayal. Having some anger added to the mix actually helped me to force myself to close the door behind (until he pushed it open again). This time, I was the driving force to separate. The reason was a mismatch in kink.

At times I feel desperate to talk to him but I know better not to. After we broke up over two months ago he kept contacting me despite me asking him not to. I started to feel cornered so I took some slightly more drastic measures to enforce silence a few weeks ago. I must admit I regret some of the harsher (but hopefully still respectful) words I used. I needed space but perhaps he had still felt like a safety net just by being there. Now it’s gone.

I can’t rush the grieving process (or deny it). I need some time to reflect, lonely walks in nature, swimming... that sort of thing. I should have more free time soon. I think it’s fair to say that love will be off the cards in future. My heart is safe with him.

I wish him a lifetime of happiness. He is the most remarkable man of them all.

Why can’t you just press a reset button, thank for the amazing memories and move on?

Princess Tinks
‘Do You Actually Have Sex?’
Posted:May 5, 2018 12:23 pm
Last Updated:May 20, 2018 2:33 pm
This is a question I’ve been asked, perhaps surprisingly often. Having had visited vanilla sites briefly, yet made my dominant desires obvious, it’s often the novices who can appear confused about what female domination might mean. Is it a common assumption that there would be no sex? Is this because of pro-dommes? Would female submissives assume similar with male dominants? Have you ever been asked?

The fact is, of course, that domination means different things to different people. There are many ways to dominate.

I admit that my preference, particularly in the initial part of the relationship, is to be a little distant. For me intimacy comes with time as the relationship develops. For instance, I’m yet to kiss my new lover. There hasn’t been any oral sex. More so he has yet to touch me although I have used him as my toy and tormented him in many ways. I’ve also established that I’m very much able to send him over the edge. I’ve figured out how to work my new joy stick.

Can you see how being allowed to touch Princess could work as a reward and something to be earned? He has described not having had been able to pleasure me with his hands or mouth ‘deliciously frustrating’. I like there to be some build-up, not just getting it all easily. Nothing is simple with Princess.

So my answer is: ‘yes, there is likely to be sex involved but don’t expect anything’ as I will of course choose what happens and when (if at all).

Princess Tinks
Instructions for a Slut
Posted:May 2, 2018 1:08 pm
Last Updated:May 20, 2018 2:34 pm
You’re to wish Princess good morning. Do your slut mantra kneeling and let Princess know. You’re to inform Princess of your estimated time of arrival at the hotel.

Once you have parked your car inform Princess, after which you’re to check in asking for two keys. Then go to Starbucks, where you will find Princess, and put a key on her table. You’re not to look into her eyes but keep your eyes humbly down and not to say a word. You will take a bag that Princess gives you.

You will have eight minutes to get into the room, take your clothes off, fold them neatly(!), put them on a desk, take a shower and wear what’s in the bag as per instructions in it. You are to kneel in the waiting position in a corner, facing the corner, whispering slut mantra.

You’re not to write any other messages than what I’ve instructed above unless there is a problem. I don’t want to hear from you but you need to keep thinking about how slutty you are and how you need discipline and to be trained. You also need to appreciate how lucky you are that Princess has chosen you as her play thing however long it may, or may not, continue.



Do you think it was unfair to write ‘SLUT’ on the outside of his bag?

Princess Tinks
How Much Does Kink Matter?
Posted:Apr 29, 2018 7:07 am
Last Updated:May 13, 2018 1:48 pm
‘I am sad you have walked away from me to chase kink.’

How many people stick together after kink lessens or dies, after their dynamic no longer works? Since my ex and I got back together and switched to an extent (he would never be a proper sub) last summer we never truly found balance. I never felt at peace. Yet there is no question we continue to love each other. I miss him every day despite not speaking to him at all. I suppose it has only been two months since we went our separate ways.

I’m sure we weren’t the only D/s couple who after the most amazing start found ourselves in a somewhat more mediocre land kinkwise. I mean we had our issues and a breakup but I’m sure others can also struggle to keep their D/s dynamic going for one reason or another. For D/s to work amazingly, for the bond to be so deliciously deep, you have to be open and honest. If there is anything disrupting that, such as hurt, kink can be hard to keep up. Not sure you can do it half-heartedly when you’ve experienced such a powerful connection. At least it doesn’t feel as fulfilling. Would this be a disappointment or would you try to find a new balance, perhaps more within vanilla at least temporarily?

I don’t think I’ve truly chased kink. It seems to come me which I’m grateful for. I consider myself lucky as I’ve met so many tremendous people. Each person seems to have come into my life serving a purpose that fits well with whatever stage I’m at and vice versa.

Princess Tinks
Blind Date of Sorts
Posted:Apr 23, 2018 3:29 pm
Last Updated:May 12, 2018 10:20 am
It isn’t a rule per se but more like a fun game. All the men who I’ve met since venturing out from my marriage since early 2014 have met me without seeing any face photos of me. The only exception was my once-upon-a-time dom as he was having none of my rules or games. That was the whole point.

I don’t know why men agree to meeting without knowing what I really look like. Apparently it increases anticipation but perhaps nervousness too. I tend to say that I’m hardly a miss universe, nor do I need to be, but unless you don’t like the look of my kind I’d like to think that you wouldn’t be utterly disappointed either. So far nobody has done a runner. I recently met another keeper.

Would you meet Princess or anybody else without having had seen a photo of their face first?

It appears that I may not be meeting anybody ‘new’ blindly or otherwise for a while...

Princess Tinks
Rule #2 Meeting for the First Time
Posted:Apr 14, 2018 5:08 am
Last Updated:May 20, 2018 2:35 pm
You may have read about my rule about not engaging in any form of (cyber) play with anyone until I’ve met them in person as can be read here Rule 1 Shall We Play Online.

I have another rule, well it has two parts, when it comes to meeting for the first time. Firstly, I never have sex during a first date. I just don’t do it so such should never be expected. This eliminates feeling pressure or regret afterwards. I suppose I’m neither spontaneous enough nor desperate.

Secondly, the first date should be treated as one-off and no further dates should be discussed until after the date has taken place. In this way there is no need to make up one’s mind straight away or having to awkwardly ‘reject’ someone on the spot. Sometimes the connection is there naturally from the start and sometimes not. Other times there is some uncertainty. Personally I’ve learnt that if there are any reservations I don’t tend to want to proceed after I’ve had time to think about it. (The one-off rule is also extended to a first ‘play date’ so that once again there will be enough time to reflect afterwards whether both parties want to continue and play again. Aftercare is always provided regardless.)

These two points are linked and are there to ensure decisions are made with careful enough consideration. If there is chemistry then by all means it’s time to take things further. May the true fun begin. That’s what it’s all about.

Do you have any rules for your first date?

Princess Tinks
Saying Goodbyes
Posted:Apr 5, 2018 2:02 am
Last Updated:May 28, 2018 12:38 pm
I for one am used to saying goodbyes having had lived in different countries and continents. One particular incident comes to mind. I had this most amazing friend, and I shall use his real name; Roberto, and the story of our friendship is remarkable in itself. He was the lover of my then boyfriend. It was the first time I encountered a non-jealous poly arrangement. In the end we both drifted away from our shared lover but our friendship grew stronger.

It was Roberto who took me to the airport and it was him who said the sweetest goodbyes ever. There were tears and utter desperation. I tried to comfort him by telling him not to be so negative that we shall meet again. The likelihood of me going back to such a faraway country were slim. I knew this. However if you think you will never see the other person when saying your farewells the thought of losing that special someone can feel too much to bear. If you say you’ll see each other again it doesn’t feel quite so desperate. Even if you never end up reuniting in months and years to come the pain diminishes and only the good memories prevail.

I still think of Roberto. It was well before the internet, not to mention social media, had become popular. He didn’t even have an email address at that time. We exchanged old fashioned letters for a while but then lost touch most probably due to moving to a new address.

In a similar fashion, is it a romantic notion or hinderance if your partner, ex-partner, says at the point of parting ways that they don’t believe you’re done but will continue one day?

Princess Tinks
You’re Nothing
Posted:Apr 1, 2018 4:36 pm
Last Updated:Apr 5, 2018 8:24 am
Imagine yourself at Princess’ feet. All you can do is listen, absorb every word, every command, every whisper.

‘In here you’re nothing. You lose your social status, your charisma, everything you’re in your everyday life. In here you’re mine. You’re here to serve me and do as I please.’

Let it all sink in. You accept your place, willingly, eagerly. There lies freedom.

‘Yet you’re everything. In here you’re the focus of Princess’ attention, the centre of her world. Do you know how lucky you are that Princess chose you?’

Perhaps Princess is awakening... Perhaps it will be her who is lucky if you choose to give her the precious gift of your sweet, virginal submission...

Princess Tinks
Ghosting from a Woman’s Viewpoint
Posted:Mar 27, 2018 12:54 am
Last Updated:May 28, 2018 12:55 pm
I understand from speaking to men that of the most annoying phenomenons about online dating is ghosting. This is when a person you have been chatting with suddenly goes quiet and disappears. The worst example is not turning up on a date and not hearing from them ever again. However is ghosting ever acceptable?

I’m sure most women agree that it’s impossible to reply to all initial emails, particularly on vanilla sites. Surely it can’t be seen as ghosting at this stage? I’d say 80% of the initial emails I get go straight to a ‘no’ pile. I do state that to get a reply from me they need to understand what I’m after, which is pretty obvious from my profile, and that they need to write in a way that it’s clear they can meet my needs. Therefore I don’t think it’s unfair if they don’t hear from me when they clearly don’t fit the bill.

What about if you have replied to them once, or even twice, but then go quiet? I’d say the emails would have still been casual at this point. Is that ghosting? If yes, then I’m guilty. To be hst, I would have probably forgotten to reply but their email was perhaps not that memorable. I’d say 15% of the initial emails I receive go to this ‘maybe’ file and only few get through to the next round. If my diussions with men have g any further, such as chatting on k i k, I wouldn’t just suddenly ignore them. It becomes pretty clear after a few more emails if there’s any potential and it should be easy to tell them if not. I’d say 5% of the emails I receive go straight to the ‘yes’ pile but to actually meet them... Well, in my case it’s pretty rare.

My advice is not to take ghosting personally. A woman, despite being genuine, might get cold feet although I do think it’s unkind not to let the other person know. There might be other reasons for their silence such as a change in personal circumstances. I’m sure I didn’t go back to every I had been chatting with after my relationship recently broke down. (I did deactivate my profile at that point though). There are, unfortunately, all the fakes and game players who aren’t looking to meet up at all despite claiming so. No sympathy for them.

Every is different but there are a few big ‘no-no’s for me when I might intentionally ghost some. The main reasons are any stalkish behaviour and vulgar language, particularly if I have already asked them to t it down and they haven’t.

I also wonder if some women are reluctant to ‘reject’ men as they might have received some interesting responses. of the latest personal examples was when a man called me ‘unhinged’ and that I wasn’t his type anyway despite in the previous email being all over me, just not in the way that appeals to me (going back to the vulgar point).

Princess Tinks

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