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You Learn...
Posted:Apr 24, 2017 11:26 am
Last Updated:Apr 24, 2017 11:36 am
You Learn...

After a while, you learn the subtle difference
Between holding a hand and chaining a soul,
And you learn that love doesn’t mean leaning
And company doesn’t mean security.
And you begin to learn that kisses aren’t contracts
And presents aren’t promises,
And you begin to accept your defeats
With your head up and your eyes open
With the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child,
And you learn to build all your roads on today
Because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans
And futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight.

After a while, you learn…
That even sunshine burns if you get too much.
So you plant your garden and decorate your own soul,
Instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you really can endure…
That you really are strong
And you really do have worth…
And you learn and learn…
With every good-bye, you learn.

— Jorge Luis Borges, “You Learn”
You and me ...
Posted:Apr 24, 2017 10:11 am
Last Updated:Apr 24, 2017 10:13 am
You and me ...

i do not want to have you
to fill the empty parts of me
i want to be full on my own
i want to be so complete
i could light a city
and then
i want to have you
cause the two of us combined
could set it on fire

— Rupi Kaur, milk and honey
1 comment
Posted:Apr 24, 2017 3:57 am
Last Updated:Apr 24, 2017 11:12 am

Empathy isn’t just something that happens to us—a meteor shower of synapses firing across the brain—it’s also a choice we make: to pay attention, to extend ourselves. It’s made of exertion, that dowdier cousin of impulse. Sometimes we care for another because we know we should, or because it’s asked for, but this doesn’t make our caring hollow. The act of choosing simply means we’ve committed ourselves to a set of behaviors greater than the sum of our individual inclinations: I will listen to his sadness, even when I’m deep in my own. To say “going through the motions”—this isn’t reduction so much as acknowledgment of the effort—the labor, the motions, the dance—of getting inside another person’s state of heart or mind. This confession of effort chafes against the notion that empathy should always arise unbidden, that genuine means the same thing as unwilled, that intentionality is the enemy of love. But I believe in intention and I believe in work. I believe in waking up in the middle of the night and packing our bags and leaving our worst selves for our better ones.

— Leslie Jamison, The Empathy Exams
Some Facts On Emotional Manipulators ....
Posted:Apr 23, 2017 1:07 pm
Last Updated:Apr 23, 2017 7:06 pm
Some Facts on Emotional Manipulators

1. They can’t be trusted. No matter what you say, they’ll turn the situation around so they seem like they’re a victim, and have been unfairly judged.

2. They leave you feeling crazy, or mixed up and confused. They’ll twist your words and motives so you feel misunderstood - and they rationalize their actions so you seem unreasonable.

3. They’re great at making you feel guilty or “bad”. Nothing you can do or say is ever right to them. No matter what you try, you know it always will be wrong.

4. They are passive aggressive. They’ll smile to your face and they’ll stab you in the back … and they’ll gladly talk about you … and pass along mean gossip.

5. They have the ability to manipulate the emotional climate in a group. So, if they’re feeling happy, and life is going well, they’re the life of the party and everyone must smile. But when their life is tough then they’ll moan, groan and complain … and they’ll make sure everybody feels miserable as well.

6. They are self-absorbed and a law unto themselves. Life is always by their rules - and everything revolves around them. They’re not accountable - and they will always please themselves.

Being in school for two years and taking a few psychology courses has taught me a bit about this type of manipulator. Plus I've been around them my entire life. I'm beginning to spot them quickly and learning to run as soon as I see them coming.
The Things He Does
Posted:Apr 23, 2017 4:35 am
Last Updated:Apr 23, 2017 3:30 pm
The Things He Does...

Tell me about yourself.”
These are the words that choked me, leaving me a floundering mess in front of his presence. He smiled, his perfectly aligned teeth slightly revealed beneath his tender lips. My eyes shifted from his bottom lip up to his speckled eyes, blinking nonstop as I tried grasping for words.
“I don’t know much about myself,” I admit. “I don’t even know who I am anymore.” I felt the same sharp reminder stab me in the chest as I voiced this realization.
“Don’t worry,” he smiled. “I will help you find her.”

— the things he does
That Four Letter Word ...
Posted:Apr 22, 2017 4:23 pm
Last Updated:Apr 23, 2017 12:50 pm
That Four Letter Word...

Doesn’t it amaze you how two people can fall in love? That on a planet with 7 billion people, two people were at the right place at the right time, said the right words, took some chances, made the time, laughed at the same joke… and somehow, all these things added up to create just one thing, a four-letter word: love.
Posted:Apr 21, 2017 2:06 pm
Last Updated:Apr 21, 2017 4:51 pm

She didn’t fit into the definition
of textbook pretty.
her head wasn’t topped
with ringlets of gold,
nor were her eyes the blue
That princess often had.
her lips weren’t plump and red,
and she wouldn’t speak to you
to reassure or to praise.
when she touched,
it wasn’t a touch
that sent ripples of tranquility
instead, it was a touch
that set me afire with desire and rage
and I burned,
burned until there was nothing left
but ashes and ruin
she wasn’t a princess,
but she was perfect,
and she was mine.

— anotherdelusionaldaydream
Self Care...
Posted:Apr 21, 2017 7:32 am
Last Updated:Apr 21, 2017 4:50 pm
Self Care..

Self care isn’t always pretty , it’s not always candles and a bathtub full of roses , sometimes it’s forcing yourself to get out of bed and dragging yourself , sometimes it’s the pep talk you give to yourself or the quick cry in the corner . sometimes it is convincing yourself to do all these things you should be doing but you have no will whatsoever , sometimes it’s cutting some ties no matter how precious they were , sometimes it’s the bitter medicine you need to give yourself .
Self care isn’t always pretty but it’s so worth it .
Introvert Together...
Posted:Apr 20, 2017 12:20 pm
Last Updated:Apr 21, 2017 4:52 pm
Introvert Together....

Introvert stuff
I think the most gratifying part of an introvert’s life is finding that person that you can be “alone together” with.

That person who you can see every single day, come home to, and enjoy their company without either of you saying a word. You’re doing your thing. Two feet away, they’re doing their thing. And the two things have nothing to do with one another and don’t require the two of you to interact.

But you’re so fucking happy that they’re there. You can reach over and touch them, you can look at them and smile, you can cuddle with them while they read, and none of these things drain you like interactions with other people typically do.

Because you’re doing your thing. And they’re doing theirs.

Alone. Together.

Love Journal...
Posted:Apr 20, 2017 12:06 pm
Last Updated:Apr 21, 2017 9:41 pm
Love Journal...

One of the reasons why we crave love, and seek it so desperately, is that love is the only cure for loneliness, and shame, and sorrow. But some feelings sink so deep into the heart that only loneliness can help you find them again. Some truths about yourself are so painful that only shame can help you live with them. And some things are just so sad that only your soul can do the crying for you.

— Gregory David Roberts, Shantaram

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