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Lillli An excellent post! I think people should choose what pleases them! If the sub wants skin on skin contact but does not get it, eventually he/ she will leave... A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. George Bernard Shaw Jenny
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I tend to think that most young people who identify as sadists typically (not always) enjoy instant gratification... it is only with experience, increased knowledge and a trusting partner wherein the long game develops and becomes more effective for both the Top and the bottom - without leaving ugly bruises. Recalling several times I was chastised by a few elders in the community because they didn't agree with my approach to sadism / dominance. I saw absolutely nothing wrong with cutting up a drawer full of a man's boxer briefs and giving him 7 pairs of panties to use instead. That someone felt I was infringing on the rights of another by physically damaging his property just made me laugh. .-*-._.-*-._.-*-._.-*-._.-*-._.-*-._.-*-._.-*-._.-*-._.-*-._.-*-._.-*-._.-*-._.-*-._.-*-._.-*-._.-*-._.-*-._.-*-._.-*-. "I hate mankind, for I think myself one of the best of them, and I know how bad I am." - Joseph Baretti   
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I have to admit that I’ve known to have enjoyed a more distant approach when dominating, particularly when there is no emotional attachment but it’s more about Just playing. I can get immense pleasure from the act of dominating as opposed to a physical act although it’s nice to combine both. Having said that if there is no connection of minds it doesn’t really do. I couldn’t just be brutal and sadist for the sake of it. Plus I think it’s a lot more fun to start of with some other kinky work, such as waiting and presenting themselves as into get into the mindset. When I was that young, in my late teens and 20s, I enjoyed the feeling of control. It made me feel powerful but in a different way than these days. It would be fun to do a research over the years and see how people’s attitudes change. Good to have you back. Good to read about kink. Hope your FL adventure will be perfect... And Stig? It would be lovely to hear about him and his role more if it feels appropriate to share x
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Gosh, I would definitely be horrified 
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